90. P.N.03|GameCube|2003|arcade shooter|2h 10m|8/10
In 2002 Capcom announced the "Capcom Five" project. This was to be a series of five exclusive games for the Nintendo GameCube, with development overseen by Shinji Mikami. Eventually only four games were released for the GameCube, and ultimately only one game in the project remained a GameCube exclusive in perpetuity. That game being P.N.03, or rather Product Number Zero Three. P.N.03 was likely not ported to other systems due to its abysmal sales. In its first two weeks in Japan, P.N.03 barely reached 10,000 units sold. In the USA, P.N.03 only managed 13,000 units sold. It seemed the gaming world of the time was not interested in a futuristic arcade shooter starring Vanessa Z. Schneider. And that dear readers, is a travesty.
P.N.03 takes place on a future space colony, where security robots called C.A.M.S. have gone berserk, attacking everyone they were supposed to protect. Vanessa Z. Schneider, a mercenary, is hired to come to this colony and destroy the rogue robots. Using her special cyber suits with high powered weaponry, cat like reflexes, and sexy techno dancing, Vanessa will do just that. She is lead along the way via radio communication with a mysterious contractor. Over time the situation becomes less clear, and a deeper conspiracy begins to surface. Is Vanessa who she thinks she truly is? Are the C.A.M.S. actually malfunctioning, or are they doing their job after all?
At its core, P.N.03 is a fast paced arcade shooter, encouraging no-hit speed runs at high difficulty levels. The more successful the player is, the more points they acquire. Points can be spent to unlock new suits for Vanessa, as well as upgrade the suits' capabilities with new dance moves. Dance moves when invoked, cause Vanessa to perform impressive acrobatics unleashing devastating attacks in their wake. While P.N.0.3.'s controls at first seem clunky, it isn't long before the player understands their purpose and gets into the groove with Vanessa. Side dodging, cartwheeling, somersault jumping, and other such evasive tactics make Vanessa hard to hit, provided the player has the skill to accommodate her moves. This game's edge detection is amazing, enemy lasers will miss Vanessa if they even go so much as through her finger gaps. With a game pushing high skill play this hard, that's the kind of attention to detail that matters.
Graphics are no slouch here either. Sure, P.N.03 is most famous for Vanessa's impeccable derriere, but nothing else graphically is slouching here. The environments are convincingly cold and lifeless, displaying a sterile space colony convincingly. The enemy robots, laser effects, and atmospheric immersion are wonderful and a joy to experience. It is true though, that graphically Vanessa is the star of the show. Primarily her outstanding skeletal animation, doubly so that it was all hand animated by one person. On the audio front, as long as you enjoy eurodance electronica, you'll have a good time. Jennifer Hale provides Vanessa's voice with utmost perfection. Sound effects like laser blasts, explosions, and everything else get the job done just fine.
P.N.03 can be as easy or as difficult as you want it to be. Easy mode is pretty easy, Normal will challenge you, and Hard will probably break you. This is a game designed for those who seek high scores, faster and faster speed runs, and the ownership of all collectables. Collectables being the suits and powering them all up to full capacity. (The only way to see all of Vanessa's dance moves is to indeed own all the suits.) P.N.03 is a short game designed for replayability. It even has optional "trial missions" that are randomly generated, allowing the player to grind for points to spend at the shop. If you enjoy arcade designs like this, you'll get a lot of mileage out of P.N.03. Here's a video of someone with decent skill playing the game:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLrGj-KrL_0
It's a shame that more gamers didn't latch onto P.N.03 when it released thirteen years ago. Many of the ideas in P.N.03 were later used by Shinji Mikami to inform his more successful futuristic shooter Vanquish, itself being a spiritual successor to P.N.03. These days P.N.03 is more known for its NSFW gifs* than much else. While I openly admit Vanessa Z. Schneider is the hottest female video game protagonist ever, the actual video game she stars in is pretty damn good too. Capcom produced this game under extreme monetary restraint and a very limited development schedule, yet still delivered a minimalist shooter tour de force. If you enjoy shooting robots, have a fondness for cyber ladies, and want to test your oldschool arcade reflexes, step onto the dance floor with P.N.03.
*I'm talking about stuff like this (seriously NSFW):
