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1. Chrono Trigger (SNES)
2. Gyromite (NES)
3. Lucy -The Eternity She Wished For- (Steam)
4. Ys III: Wanderers from Ys (Famicom)
5. Radical Dreamers (SNES)
6. Video Games 1 (TI-99/4A)
7. Portopia Renzoku Satsujin Jiken (Famicom)
8. Exile (TurboGrafx CD)
9. Exile: Wicked Phenomenon (TurboGrafx CD)
10. Xak (PC Engine CD, Xak I・II)
11. Xak II (PC Engine CD, Xak I・II)
12. Neutopia (TurboGrafx-16)
13. Captain Silver (Sega Master System)
14. Märchen Veil (Famicom Disk System)
15. Vanguard (Atari 2600)
16. Kangaroo (Atari 2600)
17. Front Line (Atari 2600)
18. Mario Bros. (Atari 2600)
19. Harmonia (Steam)
20. Donkey Kong (Atari 2600)

Well I was gonna give the 'tari a little bit of a rest, but my daughter's been really attached to this particular console lately. She wanted another Mario game, and this was the best I could do. I have the Coleco release, which sports the glorious arcade cab box art, but there's also an Atari-published variant with more traditional artwork.

Strangely enough, though the computer ports of Donkey Kong retain all four original levels, the consoles versions have all cut some content (even the NES game!). The Atari 2600 and Intellivison have parsed things down to just two stages: ramp and rivet, which are arguably the most simplistic ones.

The graphics here have also been downgraded considerably, in a somewhat humorous fashion. Donkey Kong himself is mouthless and a bit scrawny (perhaps it's actually Diddy Kong!) and the barrels in the first stage have been speckled with black dots that makes them look a bit like chocolate chip cookies. Mario is wearing some sort of one-toned boiler suit and looks fatter than ever. Lay off the spaghetti brah.

That said, the game plays really well! Controls are spot-on, and given the game's brevity that first loop is a cinch. After that it's pure high-score chasing until you overdose on cookie-barrels. There are vastly superior ports, naturally, but nothing brings the charm like the 2600.

Chips Ahoy!

Also, am I the only one that thinks what's supposed to be flames in the girder level look more like genie lamps?

Haha that's what I thought too. They're slightly more "flame-y" when animated though.

Games Beaten in 2017 So Far - 18

January (10 Games Beaten)


February (8 Game Beaten)


18. Halo Wars 2 - Xbox One - February 22



Halo Wars is an underappreciated sub-series of the Halo franchise despite the fact that it's actually what Halo was originally supposed to be. Back in the olden days of 2000 and 2001, Halo was originally envisioned as a real time strategy game. Probably realizing that they would be literally ripping off Starcraft (UNSC = Terrans, Covenant = Protoss, Flood = Zerg), they made changed it to a first person shooter. Eight years later, Microsoft says "Hey, that whole strategy game thing for Halo? Yeah, do that." And thus Halo Wars was born, receiving moderate praise and quickly being forgotten by most Xbox players. Fortunately, however, there were enough to justify the release of Halo Wars 2 (we just had to wait another eight years).



For those who haven't played the first Halo Wars, fear not; while the second game plays very similar to the first one, the stories in each are completely self-contained, and no knowledge of the events of Halo Wars is necessary to enjoy Halo Wars 2. And that's a good thing considering that I'd completely forgotten absolutely everything about Halo Wars except how good the game looked for a console RTS and how well it controlled and performed for a console RTS. In those regards, Halo Wars 2 continues to impress. The game is beautiful (which, for one of the few console exclusives that the Xbox One has to boast, one would hope), and like its predecessor, it performs far better than most would expect from a console RTS game.



Since I've praised the game's visuals and controls and set an overall positive tone for my review, let's get my complaints out of the way. The game's story was okay. That's it. Just okay. There are three Spartans who are featured during the plot (although only two of them get any real exposition), and while their personalities are interesting enough, you never really feel like you get to know them. I know that's typically harder to do with real time strategy games than with other genres, but it is possible; no one who plays through all of Starcraft can tell me that you don't get to know the personalities of Zeratul, Sarah Kerrigan, and Jim Raynor. The story certainly isn't bad, but it's not particularly memorable. It feels like a plot from one of the mid numbered Call of Duty games; not bad, per se, but painfully average. With such a short campaign to boot - only 12 missions that take, on average, 45 minutes each - it's a fun but not particularly noteworthy single player experience.



Alright, so on more positives! The battles are EPIC, and I didn't notice any slowdown whatsoever, even with a Scarab tank and 14 Scorpion tanks all attacking an enemy stronghold at the same time. It's also - as one would expect with Halo - very approachable for players of all skill levels with four difficulties. The default is Normal (obviously), and that's not too bad for those with any RTS experience at all. If that's too much for you (and, admittedly, a couple missions can put you in a tough spot if you don't have a strategy), you can bump it down to Easy. For those wanting more of a challenge (or a brutal massacre), you can also raise the difficulty to Heroic or Legendary.



I haven't dabbled much with the multiplayer, but the game does allow for co-op multiplayer vs AI over Xbox Live, so if you're a non-competitive person like me, that's perfect and adds a lot of potential replay value. The only downside is that from what I've read, unlike with Gears of War 4, there's no cross-platform play between Xbox One players and PC players, and that's a major let down. The game's mechanics, however, feel very solid, so even without cross-play, there's definitely enough to keep players coming back for more. The base building has a very Command and Conquer feel with a central base hub and building slots in pre-determined positions around that hub. In the past, I've felt rather restricted by that method of base building rather than freely placing buildings wherever I want, but between the first Halo Wars and this one, I've started to get a feel for it, and it's really grown on me. It just...works, you know?



All in all, Halo Wars 2 isn't a perfect RTS, but for one on a console, it's damn good. The visuals are beautiful, the controls are tight and solid, and the battles are absolutely epic. It's definitely a must for hardcore Halo fans, and it's a must for fans of RTS games. If you play Halo every now and then and/or think strategy games are pretty cool sometimes, I'd say pass, but if you're a strong fan of either (or, like me, both), you definitely shouldn't pass it up.

thanks for the write-up. I'm interested, but not enough to pay full price. Do you happen to know if it's one of those games where if you buy it on Xbox One you get the PC version as well?

noiseredux wrote:thanks for the write-up. I'm interested, but not enough to pay full price. Do you happen to know if it's one of those games where if you buy it on Xbox One you get the PC version as well?

Yeah, it's part of their "Play Anywhere" thing for digital purchases. There's just no cross-platform multiplayer.

1. Dragon Quest Builders (PS4)
2. Professor Layton and the Unwound Future (DS)
3. Wild Guns: Reloaded (PS4)
4. World Heroes (SNES)
5. Arkanoid: Doh It Again (SNES)
6. Strider (PS4)
7. Super Bust-A-Move (PS2)
8. Mr. Driller Drill Spirits (DS)
9. Mickey to Donald: Magical Adventure 3 (SFC)

The third game in the Disney platformer series called Magical Quest by Capcom. The GBA remake got a Western release, but the SNES version stayed in Japan. I like the other two Magical Quest games and I didn't own any SFC games, so I imported this along with Super Bomberman 3, and got a Game Genie to use as a Super Famicom "converter". I played the game Co-op with another person. A big difference I noticed between this game and the other two Magical Quest games is that the two playable characters (Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck) have some differences instead of only being differently cosmetically. While wearing the armor costume, Mickey will be able to attack in four directions, while Donald will only be able to attack sideways, but Donald will be able to roll around while defending, and Mickey can ride on top of Donald when he is doing this. While playing co-op, we accidentally kept killing each other by leaving the other person behind while moving up. This is probably my least favorite game in the series, but I still found it to be a lot of fun.

1. Chrono Trigger (SNES)
2. Gyromite (NES)
3. Lucy -The Eternity She Wished For- (Steam)
4. Ys III: Wanderers from Ys (Famicom)
5. Radical Dreamers (SNES)
6. Video Games 1 (TI-99/4A)
7. Portopia Renzoku Satsujin Jiken (Famicom)
8. Exile (TurboGrafx CD)
9. Exile: Wicked Phenomenon (TurboGrafx CD)
10. Xak (PC Engine CD, Xak I・II)
11. Xak II (PC Engine CD, Xak I・II)
12. Neutopia (TurboGrafx-16)
13. Captain Silver (Sega Master System)
14. Märchen Veil (Famicom Disk System)
15. Vanguard (Atari 2600)
16. Kangaroo (Atari 2600)
17. Front Line (Atari 2600)
18. Mario Bros. (Atari 2600)
19. Harmonia (Steam)
20. Donkey Kong (Atari 2600)
21. Jungle Hunt (Atari 2600)

Jungle Hunt was a 1982 Taito arcade game that was later ported to a decent number of systems. The 2600 port was published by Atari themselves and sports the classic silver label. If you wanna play the arcade original check out Taito Legends. Thematically, this belongs to the "explorer" genre that seemed to be so popular in the early 80s (see Pitfall!, Montezuma's Revenge, and so on). Hardcore Gaming 101 calls these "Indiana Clones." The hero of this story must work his way through through a jungle to save his beloved from some "natives." Yikes.

The game's a "side-scroller" but not quite a "platformer" primarily because there are, well, no platforms. There are four levels, though here on the 2600 levels three and four seamlessly flow into each other. Each boasts a different type of gameplay. Level one involves swinging on vines and requires a series of precise button presses. Level two is an underwater stage with deadly crocodiles. The surface of the water must be returned to periodically, lest an oxygen meter be depleted to zero. This is the only stage in the game with an offensive weapon. You can use a knife against the crocs but the hit detection is so shaky I'd recommend avoiding them, unless you care deeply about points. Level three features an avalanche of rocks, some of which must be jumped over while others need to be ducked under. And finally, the game's conclusion is a corny sequence where our hero must successfully leap over the natives to rescue his lady.

All in all, this is pretty fun. It's rare to see a game this old with so much variety amongst the various levels. It controls well, and makes a great companion to the original arcade game. I'd recommend the ColecoVision port as well, which can also be found on the ColecoVision Flashback (which is now on Steam!). I've never had much luck with the Atari 5200 port (dem controls) and the computer variations are naturally rather obscure.

No more Atari for the time being. I'm balls-deep into a PCE RPG.

I've only played Jungle Hunt on the 5200, and it was pretty good, but I can only imagine how much better it would play with a controller that doesn't suck giant dicks.

Games Beaten in 2017 So Far - 19

January (10 Games Beaten)


February (9 Game Beaten)


19. Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions - PlayStation Portable - February 24



inal Fantasy Tactics is one of those mythic games that I hear all about how amazing it is and how I need to play, but because it's so beloved, it's hard to find in the wild, and it's never been high enough on my priority list to go out of my way to order it online. Well, I was in Lost Ark in Greensboro a few months ago, and I saw a copy of the PSP port CIB for like $10. I had just gotten a PSP, so I was like "Why not?" Then, as I do with most games, I proceeded to leave it on my shelf completely ignored until a few weeks ago when I finally decided to see what all the fuss was about. Having now finished the game, I still have no idea what all the fuss is about.



I know that my opinion on the game is going to be pretty unpopular, so let me stop here and say that I tend to be pretty picky about SRPGs. To make an impression on me, a strategy RPG must do at least one of two things - give me a sense of an epic battle or make me connect with and care about the characters. Fire Emblem - the gold standard for SRPGs as far as I'm concerned - ALWAYS does the latter, and it usually does the former, as well. Valkyria Chronicles hit both masterfully. The newer XCOM games don't really have character to fall in love with for the most part, but it definitely makes the battles feel epic af. Final Fantasy Tactics? It didn't really do either for me, and that made the game a chore for me. It's a game with a lot of love from its fans, however, so I wanted to do right by it and see it through to end before making a final judgement of my own.



I don't think Final Fantasy Tactics is a bad SRPG. On the contrary, a lot of the game impressed me quite a bit. The game mechanics, in particular, are extraordinarily deep if you're the type who enjoys diving into such things. Unfortunately I'm neutral on how deep game mechanics go as long as I have fun playing it, so that wasn't really a plus for me, and the learning curve is about as steep as food prices at a football game in the North. Again, some folks like sadistic gameplay. That's what's made From Software boatloads of money. I'm not one of those folks. I like challenge with some genres (like SRPGs), but there are a couple of difficulty spikes in this game that were just...painful. Overall the game was manageable if you knew what you were doing, but those few story missions along with a few random encounters seemed rather unbalanced to me.



My biggest complaint with the game, however, are much more subjective. Simply put, the story bored me, and the character designs were unappealing to me. The story felt very cliché, and I know that's an unusual complaint to make about Final Fantasy since that series practically established most of our RPG clichés, but at no point did I feel at all invested in the game's story. The characters didn't interest me, the story didn't interest me, the attempts at tragedy didn't interest me. The entire narrative just felt very two dimensional and hollow. The character designs are a much bigger nit pick. While I applaud the very artistic hand-drawn looking style, there are two things that really bother me - no one has a nose, and even the cut scenes, their hair looks like overly greased plastic. Especially the nose, man. It's like if you tried to make a Shakespearean fantasy movie and cast Voldemort for every single role, just giving him a different wig - made out of plastic - to wear for each character. Yes, I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill; yes, the character designs really did bother me that much.



Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions really isn't a bad game. It's not. I certainly don't think it deserves the adoration it's gotten over the years, and I suspect that nostalgia leads a lot of gamers to remember it as being better than it really is (which is true for all of us with one game or another), but it's a competent albeit generic and rather monotonous SRPG. The difficulty could use some scaling (or setting options) to make it more approachable, and the characters are about as flat as Blanc's chest from Hyperdimension Neptunia, but if you're a hardcore Final Fantasy lover, then it's not a bad game. Just don't expect Fire Emblem levels of quality, storytelling, or character development.