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prfsnl_gmr
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by prfsnl_gmr Sat Jun 30, 2018 8:40 am

noiseredux wrote:I didn't know Advanced Guardian Heroes was a follow up to Streets of Rage :wink:


:lol:

Fair enough.
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PartridgeSenpai
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by PartridgeSenpai Sat Jun 30, 2018 11:57 am

Partridge Senpai's 2018 Beaten Games:
Previously: 2016 2017
* indicates a repeat

1-20

21. Deadbolt (Steam)
22. Legend of Grimrock 2 (Steam)
23. The Witness (PS4)
24. Uurnog (PC)
25. Fire Emblem Warriors (Switch)
26. Hyrule Warriors (Wii U)
27. The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword (Wii)
28. Magicka 2 (PS4)*
29. Tales of Phantasia (PSP)
30. BOXBOXBOY! (3DS)
31. Blossom Tales (Switch)

32. Wolfenstein: The Old Blood (Steam)

I really like Wolfenstein The New Order. It's one of my favorite FPS I've ever played with its big, meaty guns, fast-paced shooting, and alt-history Nazi-brutalizing story. All things I really enjoy. I'd held off on getting the stand-alone expansion for this long because I'd heard it was basically a re-hash of the first's biggest points but not quite as good. Having just beaten the first game twice in a row, I held off on getting TOB because I thought more of the same would probably burn me out. Having waited these 3 or so years to play it, it's played more or less exactly as I'd heard it did. I played on hard mode and it took me just about 10 hours.

The Guns:
The shooting and gameplay is effectively identical to New Order. You can dash, lean to see stuff, dual wield most guns, all familiar stuff. There are some new weapons in the form of a standard rifle (not the crazy moon laser ones from New Order), a kind of "emergency" grenade pistol, a pipe melee weapon you can use like a bat, and a sawed off shotgun. Unlike New Order, however, no guns in Old Blood have an alt-fire mode. None of the new weapons are that special though.

You can mow down enemies like nobody's business with the sniper rifle, because they love standing still so you can get headshots, so even someone like me who can't aim worth crap can even take down Nazi's like a champ. The pipe is pretty worthless though, as is the sawed-off, as Nazi's can melee you so quickly that you can never get in close to use it against them, and the sawed-off shotgun is basically just a gimmick weapon that's 100% worse than the New Order shotgun that it doesn't replace. It was just something to look cool in the trailer, as far as I can tell. The grenade pistol is neat, but ammo is so limited for it that I often just conserved it so much that I forgot I even had it XP

With the silenced pistol and the pipe melee weapons, this game has more of a stealth-emphasis than New Order did, but I don't think it was really to the game's strengths. By having so many encounters so heavily encourage stealth (as so many have commanders that will summon TONS of reinforcements if you're seen if they're not silently taken out), it really takes away a lot of the frantic, fun running around from cover to cover that made New Order so much fun for me. A lot of this game's elements don't really gel well with the engine that it's building off of, and the level design is just one of them.


The New Enemies:
The other element of the game that really hampers enjoyment would be the new enemy type. The heavily armored Super Soldiers appear very briefly in New Order, but they're a regularly encountered enemy in this. They're a neat stealth-gimmick in the first level when you're unarmed, but later on when they're patrolling, they make a non-stealth approach basically suicide. They're usually patrolling an area with commanders about, so encountering them directly is mostly just a great way to die as they must first be shot near the head until they collapse, special melee'd to break off their chest, and then shot in the chest until they explode. Given the giant gattling gun they carry which can easily mince you, they're really best saved until last. The prevalence of Super Soldiers really makes the stealth approach the only viable one in most situations, especially in the late game, which is why I believe Old Blood was designed as a whole with a stealthy approach in mind and it's not just a case of me being dumb and doing it in a not fun way :P . The game just isn't designed around its strengths, and it really suffers for it.

The other new enemy type is zombies, which while neat the first time are just so generally non-threatening that they REALLY feel like a gimmick. A quick shot with any gun to the head will kill them, and they never really appear in great enough numbers to pose any kind of threat worth taking seriously like the Nazis with guns are. Zombies occasionally have guns, but they move so much more slowly and aim so badly that they're only slightly more lethal than the normal unarmed ones. The zombies being so nonthreatening but only appearing mostly in the second half of the game is why the first 4 chapters took me
about 5 hours to get through while the next 4 took me about half as long. Sure, they make it more action-y, but it isn't in a way that's really interesting or better when compared with the game this one directly compares itself to. I will say though, the final boss fight fucking rocks, and it's definitely the high point of the game.


The Story:
The game is very similar to New Order in story-beats as well. You go into a suicide mission, you get captured, your friend you go in with is killed by a horrible bad guy, you go kill that bad guy, you find the resistance, etc, etc. The main problem Old Blood has is its length though. You don't have time to get to know or care about any of these characters to really give enough of a shit about them. The only exception are the first big bad guy and the friend you go in with, who are both fun, good characters, but they're both death halfway through the game and all you're left with are the resistance members you barely interact with and a bad guy who is nowhere near as compelling as the first (although the game REALLY wants you to think that she is). That combined with how quickly the last half of the levels can be completed just give the second half of the game
a weird, unfinished feeling compared to the first half.


Verdict: Not Recommended. If you're a big fan of the way New Order plays and you NEED more Wolfenstein a like that, then this really isn't much of a game for you, because I'm that guy and I didn't really like it. If you like FPS games in general and you want something a bit different, then this may interest you. It's not as good as the first one. If anything, it succeeds at making New Order's mechanics feel mediocre and rushed. But it's far from a bad game, and it's far from unenjoyable. This is just another game that doesn't really do much anything that is both unique and actually an improvement on the games its directly comparing itself to (i.e. New Order). Anything it does well isn't done as well (or done just about as well) as New Order, and most anything unique it does isn't actually an improvement. Definitely not a bad pick-up if you can get it in the bundle for PS4 and Xbone that has it bundled with New Order (as it costs basically exactly the same as New Order stand-alone), but New Order is just SUCH a better game that it's really hard for me to recommend Old Blood for the price it still asks.
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BoneSnapDeez
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by BoneSnapDeez Sat Jun 30, 2018 2:50 pm

Finally up to date with these posts...

1. Antarctic Adventure (Famicom)
2. Nuts & Milk (Famicom)
3. Commando (Atari 2600)
4. Binary Land (Famicom)
5. Devil World (Famicom)
6. Disney's Aladdin (SNES)
7. Popeye (NES)
8. Super Mario Land (Game Boy)
9. Ys: The Vanished Omens (Sega Master System)
10 Ys II: Ancient Ys Vanished - The Final Chapter (Famicom)
11. Final Fantasy Mystic Quest (SNES)
12. Lunar: The Silver Star (Sega CD)
13. Otenba Becky no Daibouken (MSX)
14. Metroid (Famicom Disk System)
15. Mahou Kishi Rayearth (Game Boy)
16. Wabbit (Atari 2600)
17. Kirby's Dream Land (Game Boy)
18. Warpman (Famicom)
19. Final Fantasy (NES)
20. Transformers: Convoy no Nazo (Famicom)
21. Arcade Archives: Moon Patrol (Switch eShop)
22. Gremlins (Atari 2600)
23. Arcade Archives: Ninja-Kid (Switch eShop)
24. Shining in the Darkness (Genesis)
25. Johnny Turbo's Arcade: Gate of Doom (Switch eShop)
26. Front Line (Atari 2600)
27. Donkey Kong 3 (NES)
28. Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins (Game Boy)
29. Exerion (Famicom)
30. Johnny Turbo's Arcade: Bad Dudes (Switch eShop)
31. Arcade Archives: Double Dragon (Switch eShop)
32. ACA NeoGeo: Ninja Combat (Switch eShop)
33. Johnny Turbo's Arcade: Wizard Fire (Switch eShop)
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Data East's Wizard Fire (1992) is the sequel to their RPG 'em up Gate of Doom. Much like its predecessor, Wizard Fire arrived on the Switch in 2018, courtesy of Johnny Turbo himself. By default the game is displayed in stretched-out CRT mode. I kinda like it.

Those familiar with Gate of Doom will find this one easy to pick up and play, as few core mechanics have been changed. That said, Wizard Fire does feature some significant alterations elsewhere. First and foremost is the expanded roster. The ninja is out; apparently Data East felt he didn't quite fit into a medieval fantasy world (Taito would beg to differ). In his stead are a male dwarf and female elf. Once again the differences between the characters are rather contrived. I go for the elf as she's apparently the fastest and most certainly the cutest. The story has been upped in this installment. Each stage is bookended by a conversation between the valiant warriors, as they approach the evil floating castle of doom. Voice-acting is comically bad and meme-worthy, but the character designs look awesome. They're decidedly amateurish, a strange hodgepodge of anime and Saturday morning cartoon, and I can't help but adore how everything and everyone looks. Despite the cornball factor and stilted dialogue, there's actually a decent sense of camaraderie among the heroes.
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In-game aesthetics have been greatly improved upon as well. Significant attention to detail was paid to level designs, and the environments are much more interesting overall. The journey begins in a ransacked town that wouldn't feel out of place in the Capcom Dungeons & Dragons games that would soon follow. Sprites are big and bold with fluid animations. And instead of being buried under the static of combat, Wizard Fire features a rousing soundtrack that takes center stage. Even the little jingle that plays upon level completion is fantastic. A final observation: the HUD has been flipped around so it's much less obtrusive compared to that of Gate of Doom. Overall, this is just a visually and aurally appealing slab of arcade action.

The two-button controls are back, with an isometric viewpoint utilized for navigation. There's a bit of additional depth to regular attacks. For instance, button-mashing will cause Eminna the elf to freeze in her tracks and unleash a sort of rapid-fire sword swipe, reminiscent of Chun-Li's lightning leg kicks. On the flip side, one should avoid button-mashing with some of the bulkier heroes, as they can unleash built-up charged attacks instead. "RPG" elements are kept very light: there are status effects, treasure, and equippable items, though the game doesn't do a great job in relaying what most things are actually used for.
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While this may appear to be objectively superior to Gate of Doom, there's one serious offense. The difficulty. This game is way too hard in a way that feels cheap, lazy, and exploitative. Only one life is allotted per credit. Status effects like poison and confusion are doled out constantly, and are essentially synonymous with instant death. Bosses are an absolute chore: massive HP tanks that can take hundreds of hits to kill. A certain duo of golems is the most obnoxious. They can only be harmed by direct hits to the head and the battle drags on for seemingly an eternity. The final boss is almost as obscene. Brew a pot of coffee before that fight and have a sack of quarters ready. Wizard Fire is designed to drain one of money (in this case: virtual money) and the constant need to continue screws with the overall pacing and progression.

Wizard Fire is fun, historically compelling, and often humorous, but oftentimes a slog, and it pales on comparison to Capcom's output and even Taito's Dungeon Magic. Still worth it for the cutscenes, though.
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ElkinFencer10
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by ElkinFencer10 Sat Jun 30, 2018 8:51 pm

Games Beaten in 2018 So Far - 76
* denotes a replay

January (16 Games Beaten)
1. Phantasy Star Portable - PlayStation Portable - January 1
2. Middle-Earth: Shadow of War - Xbox One - January 9
3. Duck Tales - NES - January 10
4. Yakuza Kiwami - PlayStation 4 - January 14
5. Xuan-Yuan Sword: The Gate of Firmament - PlayStation 4 - January 20
6. Doki Doki Literature Club - Steam - January 20
7. Deep Space Waifu - Steam - January 21
8. Turok: Dinosaur Hunter - Steam - January 21
9. Duck Tales 2 - NES - January 22
10. TaleSpin - NES - January 22
11. Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers - NES - January 23
12. Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers 2 - NES - January 24
13. Global Defence Force - PlayStation 2 - January 24
14. Darkwing Duck - NES - January 25
15. Tiny Toon Adventures - NES - January 26
16. Poi - Steam - January 28


February (18 Games Beaten)
17. Galaxy on Fire 2 Full HD - Steam - February 3
18. Final Fantasy Legend - Game Boy - February 5
19. Valkyrie Drive Bhikkhuni - Vita - February 5
20. Super Little Acorns 3D Turbo - 3DS - February 8
21. Adventures in Equica: Unicorn Training - Android - February 8
22. Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest - SNES - February 10
23. X-COM: UFO Defense - Steam - February 14
24. Ys IV: The Dawn of Ys -TurboGrafx-CD - February 18
25. Army Men - Game Boy Color - February 19
26. Army Men 2 - Game Boy Color - February 19
27. Army Men: Air Combat - Game Boy Color - February 20
28. Hatsune Miku: Project DIVA 2nd - PlayStation Portable - February 22
29. Army Men: Sarge's Heroes 2 - Game Boy Color - February 22
30. Army Men Advance - Game Boy Advance - February 24
31. Dynasty Warriors Gundam Reborn - PlayStation 3 - February 25
32. Army Men: Operation Green - Game Boy Advance - February 26
33. A Night Out - PC - February 27
34. Army Men: Turf Wars - Game Boy Advance - February 27


March (10 Games Beaten)
35. Phantasy Star - Master System - March 10*
36. Grand Kingdom - PlayStation 4 - March 17
37. Bit.Trip Beat - Wii - March 18
38. Bit.Trip Core - Wii - March 18
39. Bit.Trip Void - Wii - March 18
40. Bit.Trip Runner - Wii - March 22
41. Bit.Trip Fate - Wii - March 22
42. Bit.Trip Flux - Wii - March 24
43. Bit.Trip Runner 2: Future Legend of Rhythm Alien - Wii U - March 25
44. My Nintendo Picross: Legend of Zelda - Twilight Princess - 3DS - March 28


April (7 Games Beaten)
45. Gundam Breaker 3 - PlayStation 4 - April 4
46. Night Trap - PlayStation 4 - April 5
47. Corpse Killer - Sega CD 32X - April 9
48. Corpse Killer - Saturn - April 11*
49. Area 51 - Saturn - April 16*
50. Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers - Sega CD - April 17
51. SD Gundam G Generation Genesis - PlayStation 4 - April 28*


May (6 Games Beaten)
52. Detention - PlayStation 4 - May
53. Guacamelee - Wii U - May 6
54. EDGE - Wii U - May 7
55. RUSH - Wii U - May 9
56. Pokemon Snap - Nintendo 64 - May 27
57. Doom VFR - PS VR - May 27


June (19 Games Beaten)
58. Jurassic Pinball - Switch - June 8
59. Shaq Fu: A Legend Reborn - Switch - June 9
60. Lost Sphear - Switch - June 11
61. Medal of Honor Heroes 2 - Wii - June 12
62. Medal of Honor: Vanguard - Wii - June 14
63. Pokemon Quest - Switch - June 15
64. Persona Q: Shadow of the Labyrinth - 3DS - June 17
65. Art of Balance - Wii U - June 17
66. Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon - Switch - June 18
67. DmC Devil May Cry - PlayStation 4 - June 19
68. DmC Devil May Cry: Vergil's Downfall - PlayStation 4 - June 19
69. Assassin's Creed Rogue - PlayStation 3 - June 20
70. Assassin's Creed Unity - Xbox One - June 21
71. Assassin's Creed Chronicles: China - Xbox One - June 22
72. Assassin's Creed Chronicles: India - Xbox One - June 23
73. Assassin's Creed Chronicles: Russia - Xbox One - June 24
74. New Gundam Breaker - PlayStation 4 - June 24
75. Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard - PlayStation 3 - June 25
76. Assassin's Creed Syndicate - Xbox One - June 29


76. Assassin's Creed Syndicate - Xbox One - June 29

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Assassin's Creed Syndicate was Ubisoft's first foray into making a main series Assassin's Creed game on 8th gen hardware that isn't more broken than Hillary Clinton's presidential aspirations. It's still pretty Ubisoft (that's not meant as a compliment), but it doesn't have the catastrophic bugs that plagued Unity, and it's second most fun Assassin's Creed game to date after Black Flag.

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Assassin's Creed Syndicate takes place in London in the late 1860s during the reign of Queen Victoria. The Templar Grand Master in London has complete control of pretty much every aspect of British life and government, and despite repeated pleas from the Assassin watching over London, Henry Green, the Assassin council seems adamant that it's not yet time to strike the Templars there. So, being stubborn and impulsive young adults, twin protagonists Jacob and Evie Frye say to hell with the council and go to London on their own to start killing Templars and undoing their allegedly sinister machinations.

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Syndicate managed to hook me by giving me the one thing I crave most in games (other than waifus) - the ability to conquer territory from rival gangs/nations/factions and command squads of gang members/soldiers/lackeys to fight with me. I LOVE that, and when it said "Hey, conquer the various boroughs of London," I squeed audibly. You don't NEED to conquer London, but it makes things easier by having Templar goons replaced with your goons, and...I mean, who DOESN'T want to murder hundreds of bad guys and conquer a city in the process? It's also a great way to earn experience to unlock new skills as well as money and resources to upgrade your gang, craft equipment, or upgrade your equipment.

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The actual story in the game is decent. You're going after this Templar Grand Master, and to do that, you need to take out his underlings to weaken his hold on London and find out how to get close to him. You COULD just do these missions and skip the others, but you'd be missing some pretty awesome content. In one game, you can please your inner believer in science by helping Charles Darwin, your inner literature nerd by helping Charles Dickens, your inner healer by helping Florence Nightingale, and your inner communist by helping Karl Marx. It's...a beautiful cast of ancillary characters. There are a couple of other characters that I either don't remember or don't care about because who needs anything else when you can help Marx and Darwin? Assassins of the world, unite! You can also help Queen Victoria in the post game, but whatever, she's an imperialist and a capitalist, so who cares? Oh, and there's a hidden portal to World War I in case you want to go help Winston Churchill during his pre-Prime Minster days.

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Now that I've gotten my Marxist enthusiasm out of the way, I can talk about how the game stacks up against the train wreck of a game that was Unity. Syndicate is an improvement in literally every way, thank god. Well, almost every way. I though Unity's story had a lot more potential if the execution hadn't been so damn awful, but while being a less interesting concept in my opinion, Syndicate's execution was waaaaaay better from a narrative standpoint. The characters in Syndicate are MUCH more interesting, though. Jacob is a WAY wittier and more sarcastic protag, and Evie is both gorgeous and a perfect foil for Jacob's reckless impulsiveness and his habit of going straight to "kill everything" as the default solution for a problem.

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Syndicate also fixes almost all of my issues with Unity's game mechanics. The parkour and auto-jumping are INFINITELY more refined and appropriately responsive than in Unity, and the addition of the zipline in Syndicate makes three dimensional movement a lot easier and more fun. The jumping up and down still aren't perfect, but it's not even in the same league as the mess that Unity had. The combat is also a LOT more fluid than Unity's, and it's more satisfying as well. Visually, Syndicate is a big improvement over Unity. Textures are more detailed, character models look and move much more naturally, and - most importantly - the frame rate is a lot more stable. Again, the performance is still far from perfect, and there are still a lot of very minor Ubisoft bugs, but it's an indescribable improvement over Unity.

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Assassin's Creed Syndicate is the Assassin's Creed game that Xbox One and PlayStation 4 players wanted and deserved. If Unity was a slap to the face, then Syndicate was a hot stone massage with aromatherapy and a live violinist. Unity still had a lot of fun to be had if you could overlook the major bugs and glaring flaws (even after having had four years to patch and fix), but Syndicate is just plain fun on its own in spite of its bugs. Assassin's Creed Syndicate is a genuinely fantastic game, and I'd readily recommend it even to gamers completely unfamiliar with the series.
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ElkinFencer10
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by ElkinFencer10 Sun Jul 01, 2018 5:40 am

Games Beaten in 2018 So Far - 77
* denotes a replay

January (16 Games Beaten)
1. Phantasy Star Portable - PlayStation Portable - January 1
2. Middle-Earth: Shadow of War - Xbox One - January 9
3. Duck Tales - NES - January 10
4. Yakuza Kiwami - PlayStation 4 - January 14
5. Xuan-Yuan Sword: The Gate of Firmament - PlayStation 4 - January 20
6. Doki Doki Literature Club - Steam - January 20
7. Deep Space Waifu - Steam - January 21
8. Turok: Dinosaur Hunter - Steam - January 21
9. Duck Tales 2 - NES - January 22
10. TaleSpin - NES - January 22
11. Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers - NES - January 23
12. Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers 2 - NES - January 24
13. Global Defence Force - PlayStation 2 - January 24
14. Darkwing Duck - NES - January 25
15. Tiny Toon Adventures - NES - January 26
16. Poi - Steam - January 28


February (18 Games Beaten)
17. Galaxy on Fire 2 Full HD - Steam - February 3
18. Final Fantasy Legend - Game Boy - February 5
19. Valkyrie Drive Bhikkhuni - Vita - February 5
20. Super Little Acorns 3D Turbo - 3DS - February 8
21. Adventures in Equica: Unicorn Training - Android - February 8
22. Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest - SNES - February 10
23. X-COM: UFO Defense - Steam - February 14
24. Ys IV: The Dawn of Ys -TurboGrafx-CD - February 18
25. Army Men - Game Boy Color - February 19
26. Army Men 2 - Game Boy Color - February 19
27. Army Men: Air Combat - Game Boy Color - February 20
28. Hatsune Miku: Project DIVA 2nd - PlayStation Portable - February 22
29. Army Men: Sarge's Heroes 2 - Game Boy Color - February 22
30. Army Men Advance - Game Boy Advance - February 24
31. Dynasty Warriors Gundam Reborn - PlayStation 3 - February 25
32. Army Men: Operation Green - Game Boy Advance - February 26
33. A Night Out - PC - February 27
34. Army Men: Turf Wars - Game Boy Advance - February 27


March (10 Games Beaten)
35. Phantasy Star - Master System - March 10*
36. Grand Kingdom - PlayStation 4 - March 17
37. Bit.Trip Beat - Wii - March 18
38. Bit.Trip Core - Wii - March 18
39. Bit.Trip Void - Wii - March 18
40. Bit.Trip Runner - Wii - March 22
41. Bit.Trip Fate - Wii - March 22
42. Bit.Trip Flux - Wii - March 24
43. Bit.Trip Runner 2: Future Legend of Rhythm Alien - Wii U - March 25
44. My Nintendo Picross: Legend of Zelda - Twilight Princess - 3DS - March 28


April (7 Games Beaten)
45. Gundam Breaker 3 - PlayStation 4 - April 4
46. Night Trap - PlayStation 4 - April 5
47. Corpse Killer - Sega CD 32X - April 9
48. Corpse Killer - Saturn - April 11*
49. Area 51 - Saturn - April 16*
50. Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers - Sega CD - April 17
51. SD Gundam G Generation Genesis - PlayStation 4 - April 28*


May (6 Games Beaten)
52. Detention - PlayStation 4 - May
53. Guacamelee - Wii U - May 6
54. EDGE - Wii U - May 7
55. RUSH - Wii U - May 9
56. Pokemon Snap - Nintendo 64 - May 27
57. Doom VFR - PS VR - May 27


June (20 Games Beaten)
58. Jurassic Pinball - Switch - June 8
59. Shaq Fu: A Legend Reborn - Switch - June 9
60. Lost Sphear - Switch - June 11
61. Medal of Honor Heroes 2 - Wii - June 12
62. Medal of Honor: Vanguard - Wii - June 14
63. Pokemon Quest - Switch - June 15
64. Persona Q: Shadow of the Labyrinth - 3DS - June 17
65. Art of Balance - Wii U - June 17
66. Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon - Switch - June 18
67. DmC Devil May Cry - PlayStation 4 - June 19
68. DmC Devil May Cry: Vergil's Downfall - PlayStation 4 - June 19
69. Assassin's Creed Rogue - PlayStation 3 - June 20
70. Assassin's Creed Unity - Xbox One - June 21
71. Assassin's Creed Chronicles: China - Xbox One - June 22
72. Assassin's Creed Chronicles: India - Xbox One - June 23
73. Assassin's Creed Chronicles: Russia - Xbox One - June 24
74. New Gundam Breaker - PlayStation 4 - June 24
75. Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard - PlayStation 3 - June 25
76. Assassin's Creed Syndicate - Xbox One - June 29
77. Ride to Hell: Retribution - Xbox 360 - June 30


77. Ride to Hell: Retribution - Xbox 360 - June 30

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People who know me and my gaming and collecting habits know that I like to collect and play through really notoriously horrible games. Part of why I do it is to be able to judge these games for myself. Part of why I do it is because I hate myself and think I deserve to be tortured (just kidding...but not really). Most of why I do it, however, is because I find them entertaining in a Mystery Science Theater 3000 sort of way. If you don't get that reference, you're too young to read this; kindly close the tab. Ride to Hell: Retribution is perhaps more infamous even than Shaq Fu or ET for 2600 and currently holds the second lowest Metacritic aggregate score with a 16 out of 100 (the lowest is Family Party: 30 Great Games Obstacle Arcade for Wii U with a score of 11 out of 100).

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Oh god, where to begin with this game? It's an absolute clusterfuck. "Unmitigated disaster" doesn't even begin to describe it. It truly, literally, legitimately is the worst game that I've ever played, and I've played a lot of trash. I guess let's start on the surface - visuals and audio. The game looks like a hot mess. Keep in mind that this game launched in 2013, the same year as the Xbox One. We'd already had Halo 4 and Gears of War 3 completely blow our minds with the amazing visuals that the Xbox 360 could produce, and then we get this mess that could be outperformed by the Wii. I promise that if you used composite cables for both and set both to run 480i on the same TV, you would find stacks of Wii games that look better than this. When you've got a console capable of 1080p against a console that can't do better than 480p, you should never have a game on the former outdone by one on the latter especially not the same year that its successor releases.

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Not only does the game look worse than Arnold Ernst Toht's face at the end of Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark, but the disaster of its audio design surpasses its visual failure. The music is...okay...but it's unbearably repetitive. Every track is the same three or four measures repeated ad nauseam. The real crime here - and as far as I'm concerned, it constitutes a crime against humanity - is the voice acting. Even if we include early 90s voice acting and FMV acting, the voice acting in this game is abhorrent. When I reviewed Chasing Dead, I SLAMMED that game for its downright insulting acting, but Ride of Hell blows that game out of the water. I didn't think such a thing was possible in a game actually sold for money on major platforms, but the acting is even worse than Chasing Dead's. Some characters' voice acting is physically painful to hear. The audio balance is so bad in some places that the music completely drowns out the dialogue, and some lines are just totally silent despite the character's lips' moving although those things might be more a blessing than a curse given the quality.

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The story, while mundane and cliche in concept, had some potential to be at least passable. The execution and lack of any character development whatsoever ruined that, though. You play as Jake, a soldier who's just returned from a tour of duty in Vietnam, on a quest of vengeance to - single handedly - destroy the entire Devil's Hand biker gang. This gang controls literally almost the whole state (whatever state it is; from the environment, I'd guess Arizona, New Mexico, or Nevada, but the game never specifies), and this one pissed of veteran on a motorcycle kills everyone in it. I'm all for suspension of disbelief in games, but having no actual help? That's...a bit much.

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Even with how crappy the game looks, how awful it sounds, how horrible the voice acting is, and how pathetic the story is, none of those are even the worst aspects of the game (although the voice acting does come pretty close). The game's worst aspect is the performance. The damn thing just doesn't work half the time. I mean, technically it's playable, but it's an absolute broken mess. Sonic Boom and Assassin's Creed Unity both look like competent, well polished games next to this mess. Some enemies' arms will inexplicably stretch like Mr. Fantastic when they're killed, dead enemies will start to have seizures, and explosions' splash damage seems completely arbitrary. Riding the motorcycle is a complete crapshoot if hitting something will make you restart or just let you clip through it, aiming is a pain with how jerky and stiff the controls are. The load times are reminiscent of the Neo Geo CD, and textures just pop in whenever they feel like it. Or they don't. Sometimes they don't, and characters will just go through a whole cut scene looking blurrier than an early Nintendo 64 game. Sometimes the game will just - perhaps mercifully - get fed up with its own incompetence and crash entirely. The frame rate hits an ABSOLUTE maximum of about 25, but it normally hovers between 15 and 20 fps. Even with a frame rate that low, dips are extraordinarily common. You'd think you're trying to run Crysis 3 on Windows XP. I mean, yeah, technically it works, and it's possible to play the game, but dear god, good luck keeping your sanity through the plethora of control issues and downright inundation of bugs and performance problems.

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I'm a really progressive guy in most cases, but I usually make pretty generous exceptions for video games at least with regards to violence and characterization. Some characters are ass holes, and that's often necessary for the plot. A character is a raging racist? As long as the game's entire point isn't "black people suck" or something, I'll overlook that because usually, a racist character is in a game to make a point or provide a character foil or something. Some of my favorite games could probably be considered downright chauvinistic with how severely anime girls are objectified. Seriously, Gal*Gun and Moe Chronicle alone are enough for people to be justified in saying that I'm a shitty feminist, and I can't disagree. With all of that in mind as context for this next statement...dear god, this game has just about the most screwed up and offensive portrayal of women that I've ever seen in a game (except, of course, the infamous Custer's Revenge and Beat 'Em and Eat 'Em). Every single girl in the entire game (except for one at the end) is half naked, and they all end up sleeping with Jake (although this is, quite awkwardly, done while still fully dressed). They ALL play the "damsel in distress," they're all submissive to the men in the game, and none of them seem capable of doing anything for themselves; they have to have a male character to help them with everything. Like, dear god, at least the objectified anime girls in the games I love have strong and pretty independent personalities. These girls are like worst of both worlds - half naked 24/7 AND entirely dependent and submissive.

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There's literally nothing redeeming whatsoever about Ride to Hell: Retribution. It might be entertaining to make fun of if you're drunk and playing it with friends who are also drunk, but in terms of objective critique, there's literally absolutely nothing about the game that can possibly be praised. The graphics are crap. The voice acting is crap. The story is crap. The characters are crap. The gameplay is crap. The combat is crap. The driving is crap. Everything is crap. This is literally the worst game I've ever played.
Exhuminator wrote:Ecchi lords must unite for great justice.

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MrPopo
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by MrPopo Mon Jul 02, 2018 1:59 am

1. Ultima V - PC
2. Ultima VI - PC
3. Might and Magic VI - PC
4. Realms of Arkania: Blade of Destiny - PC
5. Pool of Radiance - PC
6. Curse of the Azure Bonds - PC
7. Secret of the Silver Blades - PC
8. Pools of Darkness - PC
9. Gateway to the Savage Frontier - PC
10. Treasures of the Savage Frontier - PC
11. Champions of Krynn - PC
12. Death Knights of Krynn - PC
13. Dark Queen of Krynn - PC
14. Into the Breach - PC
15. Lords of the Realm - PC
16. Dark Sun: Shattered Lands - PC
17. Lords of the Realm II - PC
18. The Alliance Alive - 3DS
19. Shattered Steel - PC
20. Guacamelee! Super Turbo Championship Edition - PC
21. Battletech - PC
22. Pillars of Eternity: The White March Part I - PC
23. Pillars of Eternity: The White March Part II - PC
24. Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon - Switch
25. Pillars of Eternity II - PC
26. Dragon Ball FighterZ - PS4
27. Detroit: Become Human - PC4
28. Call of Duty: United Offensive - PC
29. The Last of Us - PS4
30. The Last of Us: Left Behind - PS4
31. Prey: Mooncrash - PC
32. Horizon Zero Dawn: The Frozen Wilds - PS4
33. Resident Evil 7 - PC
34. Resident Evil 7: Not A Hero - PC
35. Warhammer 40000: Dawn of War III - PC

Dawn of War was a pretty solid RTS that ended up with three expansions. Mechanically it was similar to StarCraft, but had an emphasis on the idea of units being squads; individual members died (and could be replenished) and you could attach special units as squad leaders. Dawn of War II went fully into squads, with the campaign involving you only controlling a handful of hero squads, making the whole thing a focus on heavy micro and no economy. Dawn of War III tries to split the difference; now you have full on hero units a la Warcraft III, including some giant units (Imperial Knight, Wraithknight, some sort of Ork contraption), while bringing back base building and resources. Unfortunately, they kept a bit too much micro (every single unit has an active ability) and completely jacked up the flow of the economy. So what should have been a strong title ends up being a slog to play with.

The first thing that will strike you is the balance of the economy. Like DoW 1 you capture control points to get your resources. Now, different control points generate different amounts of resources, and then to exploit those resources you need to build individual gathering structures on them. You can then upgrade the entire point to increase the rate of resource gain. Slightly over complicated, but nothing too bad. But then things go off the rails a bit. There are two resources, requisition and energy, the latter of which is gained at a much slower rate. Requisition is used for infantry, and energy is used for vehicles. The balance tends to be that infantry are between 300 and 500 requisition, with 0 to 30 energy needed. By contrast, vehicles are 100 to 150 requisition, and 150 to 300 energy. The intent is to make vehicles rarer and to not replace infantry entirely. But the divide between vehicles and infantry is pretty huge; a critical mass of vehicles becomes a death ball that will roll over everything, so you still save up and go for them anyway. Also, upgrades require the opposite of the primary resource. So vehicle upgrades require requisition, and infantry need energy. This makes it very hard to have a balanced force. But all that pales in comparison to the upkeep system. This is poorly messaged and very opaque. Basically, once you have a certain number of units you start to take a penalty to your resource generation. This penalty is also a fixed number, rather than Warcraft III's percentage (100%, 70%, 40% generation). That means you can end up generating zero resources (usually energy) if you get too many units. This is indicated when you mouse over your resource totals, but in a really bad way. It shows something like "+40 -60". This means that you are currently generating 40, but you could be generating 100, because 60 is being wasted. I would have expected the first number to only change as I capture resource points. And the further failure in messaging is no where can you get any idea of when you will start to lose resource generation, and whether or not it is just based on your population or on specific units. I still have no idea what specifically causes the drain.

On the combat side, things are kind of a clusterfuck. You still have the melee/ranged balance, where ranged units can cut down melee before they get in range, but once melee gets in range they tear apart ranged. So you want a mixture of both, but that also means you probably want a couple of groups to keep the melee from running into a hail of fire. More frustrating for me is the fact that every single unit has at least one active ability and the game expects you to use them. This wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that tabbing through your army is implemented extremely poorly. Now, Warcraft III did this well; you would always start with heros in that party, then you would tab through groups of units based on a fixed order. When you activated an ability it would use a single unit in the tabbed group's ability. It was simple and let you quickly activate your various tools. In DoWIII you step through your heros in a random order, then you step through individual units of your force (which might number at 20) and seems to be in order of when you added them to the group. So you can't quickly get an ability off without actually clicking on whoever you want to use it. Another problem is the hero abilities tend to be very busy; many have multi stage effects, so you need to be a fair amount of attention to them, lowering the effectiveness compared to a fire and forget ability. And then in the campaign they like to have things that will suddenly spawn a hazard or a ton of enemies to wipe out a large chunk of your forces for no foreseeable reason.

The story of the game is ok; it's fairly standard 40k stuff. It bounces between the three factions across 15 missions, before shit happens and you team up for the last two missions, one of which is a hero only mission. Some of the missions are annoying not because they are an actual challenge, and more because they just have a lot of attrition to keep you from quickly building up the death ball. If you want to see good difficulty in an RTS campaign look at the original Command & Conquer; here it is missing, and you can just sit back and get a death ball in every mission, with different missions just making it take longer or not.

It's rather unfortunate that this game seemed like a return to form after the misstep (in my opinion) of DoW II, but something went wrong in the final gameplay. I will say, though, that every time you get to use the Imperial Knight you feel utterly badass and it makes the final couple Space Marine missions a treat.
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dsheinem
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by dsheinem Mon Jul 02, 2018 4:53 pm

People who don't have an overflowing love for Guardian Heroes are likely incapable of feeling true joy, so don't be too hard on them!

Games Beaten 2018

Darkwing Duck - NES (PS4)
DuckTales - NES (PS4)
DuckTales 2 - NES (PS4)
Talespin - NES (PS4)
Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers - NES (PS4)
Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers 2 - NES (PS4)
Scarecrow - PS1 (Vita)
The Heart of Dark - PS1 (Vita)
Justice - PS1 (Vita)
Caligo - PC
Tomb Raider (2013) - X1
Nephise Begins - PC
Diablo III: The Darkening of Tristam - PC
Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams - X1
Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest - SNES
Forza Horizon 3 - X1/ PC
Elbub - PC
Tekken 4 -PS2
Injustice 2 -PS4
Apollo 11 VR - PSVR
Star Wars Battlefront II -PS4
Unearthing Mars - PSVR
Jenny of the Prairie - C64
Part Time UFO - - iOS
Marvel vs Capcom Infinite - PS4
War of the Monsters -PS2
Far Cry 5 - PS4
Uncharted: Lost Legacy - PS4
Soul Calibur 2 - GCN
God of War (2018) - PS4 *new*
Orcs and Elves - NDS
Tekken 7 - PS4
House of the Dead 4 Special - PS3
S.A.R. (Search and Rescue) - PS3
The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim VR - PSVR
Time Crisis: Razing Storm - PS3
Time Crisis IV - PS3
Marvel Ultimate Alliance - PS4
Dodonpachi Saidaioujou - 360
Ketsui Kizuna Shigokutachi Extra - PS3
Bad Dudes - Arcade (Wii)
Crude Buster - Arcade (Wii)
Wizard Fire - Arcade (Wii)
Heavy Barrel - Arcade (Wii)
The Bouncer - PS2
Thor: God of Thunder - NDS
Destiny 2: Warmind - PS4
King Oddball - PS4 *new*
High Hell - PC *new*
Postal Redux - PC *new*

Total: 50


Previously: 2017 2016 2015 2014 2013 2012 2011 2010


These are all ace.

King Oddball is the best Angry-Birds style game I have played in a long time, and it has a strange charm and addicting set of physics. It is (was?) a free PS+ game, and anyone who has the service should definitely grab it.

High Hell is a cel-shaded(?) and highly stylized twitch FPS in the vein of something like Superhot, and it has a nice sense of humor and a good level of challenge. Worth the sale price in the current Steam sale...

I was glad to finally play through Postal, which is really quite a fantastic twin stick shooter that clearly belongs somewhere in the lineage of Smash TV->Dead Nation. It is funny to think this was seen as so controversial for so long...
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BoneSnapDeez
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by BoneSnapDeez Mon Jul 02, 2018 5:51 pm

dsheinem wrote:People who don't have an overflowing love for Guardian Heroes are likely incapable of feeling true joy, so don't be too hard on them!


Haha, worth reposting!
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noiseredux
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by noiseredux Mon Jul 02, 2018 10:01 pm

This coming from a guy who "falls asleep" during many a beloved game.

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=45049&p=834009&hilit=Narcolepsy#p834009
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dsheinem
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Re: Games Beaten 2018

by dsheinem Tue Jul 03, 2018 10:26 am

Games Beaten 2018
The first 50:
Darkwing Duck - NES (PS4)
DuckTales - NES (PS4)
DuckTales 2 - NES (PS4)
Talespin - NES (PS4)
Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers - NES (PS4)
Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers 2 - NES (PS4)
Scarecrow - PS1 (Vita)
The Heart of Dark - PS1 (Vita)
Justice - PS1 (Vita)
Caligo - PC
Tomb Raider (2013) - X1
Nephise Begins - PC
Diablo III: The Darkening of Tristam - PC
Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams - X1
Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest - SNES
Forza Horizon 3 - X1/ PC
Elbub - PC
Tekken 4 -PS2
Injustice 2 -PS4
Apollo 11 VR - PSVR
Star Wars Battlefront II -PS4
Unearthing Mars - PSVR
Jenny of the Prairie - C64
Part Time UFO - - iOS
Marvel vs Capcom Infinite - PS4
War of the Monsters -PS2
Far Cry 5 - PS4
Uncharted: Lost Legacy - PS4
Soul Calibur 2 - GCN
God of War (2018) - PS4 *new*
Orcs and Elves - NDS
Tekken 7 - PS4
House of the Dead 4 Special - PS3
S.A.R. (Search and Rescue) - PS3
The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim VR - PSVR
Time Crisis: Razing Storm - PS3
Time Crisis IV - PS3
Marvel Ultimate Alliance - PS4
Dodonpachi Saidaioujou - 360
Ketsui Kizuna Shigokutachi Extra - PS3
Bad Dudes - Arcade (Wii)
Crude Buster - Arcade (Wii)
Wizard Fire - Arcade (Wii)
Heavy Barrel - Arcade (Wii)
The Bouncer - PS2
Thor: God of Thunder - NDS
Destiny 2: Warmind - PS4
King Oddball - PS4
High Hell - PC
Postal Redux - PC

Super Night Riders - PC *new*
Slap City - PC *new*

Total: 52


Previously: 2017 2016 2015 2014 2013 2012 2011 2010

Played through a couple of arcade-style games I picked up in the Steam sale.

Super Night Riders is a very good Outrun-style game that offers a lot of nice aesthetics as well a sliding (and fair) difficulty. I cleared through each of the 6 stages (in "Classic" mode) and would easily and fully recommend this to anyone who likes games in the Outrun series.

Slap City is a Smash Bros.-type game that does a lot of things right and has an interesting set of characters. It would be great to see this take off as a serious contender to Smash...it feels more like that series than even Sony's PS All Stars Battle Royale game did.

I can see coming back to both of these for some quick arcade style action on the Steam Link. They play great with a controller on a big TV!

noiseredux wrote:This coming from a guy who "falls asleep" during many a beloved game.

http://racketboy.com/forum/viewtopic.ph ... sy#p834009


:lol:
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