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BogusMeatFactory
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by BogusMeatFactory Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:46 am

prfsnl_gmr wrote:
RBI Baseball is a classic sports game that I played through for the summer games challenge. The Detroit Tigers had a rough season, but I'd like to think that they had a lot of fun off the field. The single-player mood is much weaker than the multiplayer mode, but I still had some fun with it. I will likely play it with my children sometime, but I very much doubt I will play through another season anytime soon.

.


Wooo!!! Detroit represent!!!!so
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prfsnl_gmr
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by prfsnl_gmr Wed Aug 30, 2017 2:21 pm

I'm not sure I'd call what they did on the field "representing". I imagine them more like the team from Major League...without the whole getting good at baseball part.
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BogusMeatFactory
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by BogusMeatFactory Wed Aug 30, 2017 2:47 pm

prfsnl_gmr wrote:I'm not sure I'd call what they did on the field "representing". I imagine them more like the team from Major League...without the whole getting good at baseball part.


As long as it was like major league, I am happy. My most favorite stupid movie of all time.
Ack wrote:I don't know, chief, the haunting feeling of lust I feel whenever I look at your avatar makes me think it's real.

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ElkinFencer10
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by ElkinFencer10 Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:15 pm

Games Beaten in 2017 So Far - 90
* denotes a replay

January (10 Games Beaten)
1. Persona 4 Arena - Playstation January 1
2. Chrono Trigger - SNES - January 7
3. Ys: The Vanished Omens - Master System - January 8
4. MUSHA - Genesis - January 10
5. Dragon Quest Heroes: The World Tree's Woe and the Blight Below - PlayStation 4 - January 11
6. Ys I - TurboGrafx-CD - January 13
7. Ys II - TurboGrafx-CD - January 14
8. Dragon Quest Builders - PlayStation 4 - January 23
9. Resident Evil 7: Biohazard - PlayStation 4 - January 26
10. School Girl/Zombie Hunter - PlayStation 4 - January 29


February (12 Games Beaten)
11. Fire Emblem Heroes - Android - February 3
12. The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker HD - Wii U - February 5
13. Dante's Inferno - PlayStation 3 - February 7
14. Hotel Dusk: Room 215 - DS - February 11
15. Persona 4: Dancing All Night - Vita - February 12
16. Sniper Elite 4 - PlayStation 4 - February 17
17. Pony Quest - NES - February 19
18. Halo Wars 2 - Xbox One - February 22
19. Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions - PlayStation Portable - February 24
20. Hotline Miami - PlayStation 4 - February 26
21. Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon and the Blade of Light - Famicom - February 27
22. Bad Dudes - NES - February 28


March (6 Games Beaten)
23. Root Letter - PlayStation 4 - March 2
24. Vroom in the Night Sky - Switch - March 10
25. The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild - Switch - March 17
26. Super Bomberman R - Switch - March 18
27. Super Mario Run - Android - March 24
28. I Am Setsuna - Switch - March 24


April (9 Games Beaten)
29. Mass Effect: Andromeda - PlayStation 4 - April 1
30. Sniper Elite: Nazi Zombie Army - PlayStation 4 - April 2
31. Sniper Elite: Nazi Zombie Army 2 - PlayStation 4 - April 2
32. New Frontier Days: Founding Pioneers - Switch - April 3
33. Sniper Elite: Nazi Zombie Army 3 - PlayStation 4 - April 4
34. Persona 5 - PlayStation 4 - April 17
35. Alienation - PlayStation 4 - April 18
36. Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc - PlayStation 4 - April 23
37. Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair - PlayStation 4 - April 29


May (14 Games Beaten)
38. Puyo Puyo Tetris - Switch - May 4
39. Fire Emblem Gaiden - Famicom - May 6
40. Mario Kart 8 Deluxe - Switch - May 6
41. Outlast II - PlayStation 4 - May 7
42. Dishonored - PlayStation 4 - May 10
43. Snipperclips: Cut it Out, Together! - Switch - May 12
44. Pikmin - Gamecube - May 12
45. Metal Slug - Neo Geo MVS - May 13*
46. Dariusburst CS: Chronicle Savior - PlayStation 4 - May 14
47. Batman: The TellTale Series - PlayStation 4 - May 17
48. Batman: Arkham VR - PlayStation 4 - May 18
49. Fire Emblem Echoes: Shadows of Valentia - 3DS - May 25
50. Farpoint - PlayStation 4 - May 27
51. The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings - Xbox 360 - May 29


June (10 Games Beaten)
52. Star Trek: Bridge Crew - PlayStation 4 - June 2
53. The Walking Dead: A New Frontier - PlayStation 4 - June 3
54. Rebel Galaxy - PC - June 18
55. The Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel II - Vita - June 20
56. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault - PC - June 21*
57. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault - Spearhead - PC - June 21
58. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault - Breakthrough - PC - June 22
59. Aliens Versus Predator - PC - June 23
60. Army Men - PC - June 24*
61. Apartment 666 - PC - June 26


July (20 Games Beaten)
62. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Hyperstone Heist - Genesis - July 12*
63. The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt - Hearts of Stone - PlayStation 4 - July 15
64. The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt - Blood and Wine - PlayStation 4 - July 22
65. The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt - PlayStation 4 - July 24
66. Splatoon 2 - Switch - July 25
67. Kamiko - Switch - July 25
68. Crimson Skies: High Road to Revenge - Xbox - July 26
69. Panzer Dragoon - Saturn - July 27*
70. Snake Pass - Switch - July 27
71. Buck Bumble - Nintendo 64 - July 28*
72. Castlevania - NES - July 29
73. Castlevania II: Simon's Quest - NES - July 29
74. Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse - NES - July 29
75. Super Castlevania IV - SNES - July 30
76. Castlevania Adventure - Game Boy - July 30
77. Castlevania Adventure Rebirth - Wii - July 30
78. Contra Rebirth - Wii - July 31
79. Heavy Fire: Special Operations - Wii - July 31
80. Heavy Fire: Black Arms - Wii - July 31
81. Panzer Dragoon II Zwei - Saturn - July 31*


August (9 Games Beaten)
82. Sunrider: Mask of Arcadius - Steam - August 4
83. Panzer Dragoon Saga - Saturn - August 5
84. Sunrider: Liberation Day - Steam - August 6
85. Emily is Away - Steam - August 8
86. Ys III: Wanderers from Ys - SNES - August 19
87. Nights of Azure - PlayStation 4 - August 25
88. Uncharted: The Lost Legacy - PlayStation 4 - August 26
89. Strike Suit Zero: Director's Cut - Xbox One - August 27
90. Devil's Third - Wii U - August 30*


90. Devil's Third - Wii U - August 30*

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This is a review that I have wanted to write for a long time.  It will also likely end up being the least popular opinion I ever express on this blog.  I want to dedicate this to my dear high school friend and we're-totally-not-actually-gay-but-maybe-a-little-probably husband, Grant, for inspiring me to replay this shitty gem.  Devil's Third is a Wii U exclusive (I don't count the PC port since it's only the online portion and was only made available in Japan) that it universally considered to be one of the worst games ever to see a retail release on the platform.  It also happens to be one of my favorite games on the console and probably my absolute favorite action game.  Don't get me wrong - the game is straight up garbage.  It's the kind of beautiful, testosterone-packed garbage that makes me salivate with irrational glee.

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Devil's Third was the brainchild of developer Tomonobu Itagaki of Dead or Alive and Ninja Gaiden fame and was to be the first game developed by Valhalla Game Studios, a studio formed in 2008 by Itagaki and other former Tecmo employees.  Initially beginning life as an Xbox 360 game, Devil's Third went through one development issue after another, at one point being planned as a multiplatform release for Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and PC until THQ backed out.  The idea was eventually pitched to Nintendo and, because of their lack of mature, online capable games, they agreed to publish.  Originally being envisioned as a trilogy, Devil's Third would unfortunately be pretty much universally slammed by critics, all but ensuring its sequels would never see the light of day.  Those of us irrationally enamored by the game's craptasticitude can only hope and pray that, like Shaq Fu, it's infamy will one day allow the shameful game to rise from the ashes and disappoint a new generation of gamers.

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The first indication that this game is going to be gloriously awful is its entire premise.  You play as Ivan, a former Soviet black ops soldier serving an 850 year sentence in Guantanamo Bay for terrorism but who also secretly works for the US government and therefore has his 2000 square foot prison cell outfitted with a 100" TV, a drum set, massive speakers, a king sized bed, and a stereo system I could never dream of affording.  When a mysterious Russo-Japanese ninja terrorist hijacks a satellite and makes every other satellite in orbit explode, disabling every electronic device on Earth except those needed for the game's plot, the American military calls on Ivan to step in and save the world.  He does so with a big ass katana, no shirt, and sometimes even a gun or two.  There's a pretty big group of American troops to help him with this, but they're really only useful for indicating that there are bad guys around when their heads explode like watermelons.  Oh, and there's also a deadly biological weapon, giant mutant creatures that wouldn't be out of place as Resident Evil bosses, nuclear weapons, and ninja.  Tons of ninja.  You could have a boy in seventh grade write a story, and it would probably be less ridiculous than Devil's Third.  And that's exactly why I love this game so much.

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This is the part where I would normally talk about the game's sound design.  I say normally because I can only halfway do that now since I don't really remember any music from the game.  That's not to say that there's no music; I was just so wrapped up in the god awful story and cheese-fest action that I was paying no attention and don't remember if there was or not.  What I do remember is the voice acting.  It's TERRIBLE, and I mean that in the best way.  It's like a high school play - the acting is ALMOST good, but....it's just not.  Ivan's voice is the worst about it; rather than sounding like a real Russian accent, it sounds like an American trying to sound like a stereotypical Russian.  Like, think Japanese characters in American cartoons in the 1940s and 1950s.  That kind of stereotypical accent that doesn't actually sound anything like it's supposed to.  I'm not sure if I'd say it's offensive, but it's just bad, which just adds to the B-movie cheese factor.

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The visuals show its Xbox 360 roots.  By that, I mean that this game could probably run on an Xbox 360 without being especially taxing on the hardware.  That's not to say that the game looks bad, but it doesn't use the Wii U's potential.  I know that the Wii U isn't exactly a graphical powerhouse by 2015 standards, but even by Wii U standards, Devil's Third doesn't really look particularly impressive.  This is especially evident when you kill an enemy with a shotgun or sniper rifle - they explode.  Like, the shotgun kind of makes sense under certain circumstances - blasting a guy point blank, I could see - but like, if I shoot a guy in the torso with a sniper rifle from 30 yards away, his entire torso probably isn't going to explode into four or five chunks.  They aren't even realistic-ish looking chunks.  They're just like generic meat chunks.  And when you shoot someone in the head, the head explodes and this thick, goopy fountain of blood spews from the neck (although I think that adds to the ridiculous atmosphere of the game).

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So let me explain why I love this game so much because, objectively, it really is a horrible game.  If you're familiar with Steven Segal and his movies, imagine that but as a video game.  That's Devil's Third.  Steven Segal's movies are the most bullshit stupid insults to cinema, but they're so addicting for mindless action.  He's a horrible actor, the stories are all complete nonsense, and the fight scenes are INSANELY over the top....and that's exactly what makes them addicting.  The same is true of Devil's Third.  It's awful but in the best possible way.  If you only like compelling stories or rational combat scenes, then this probably isn't for you, but if you're the kind of person who likes explosion and setting shit on fire, then you might get some mindless enjoyment out of Devil's Third.  The gameplay is really at the heart of what's enjoyable here; a game can be ridiculous and still be a pain in the ass to play.  Devil's Third, while suffering from some occasional slow down, plays really well.  It just sucks in every other regard.

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Devil's Third, despite being (accurately) dubbed "Devil's Turd" by the internet, holds a spot near and dear to my heart.  Sure, part of that is because I adore the Wii U in general, and it's cool to know that I have an extremely rare game, but it's a total guilty pleasure.  It's objectively a shitstorm in pretty much every respect, but DAMN is it fun in a mindless violence kind of way.  Sprinting across a battlefield with no shirt and killing a guy with a sword while he's shooting at you with a machine gun?  AWESOME.  It's definitely earned it's negative reputation, but like Sharknado and Tremors, that's exactly why it's awesome.  If I were rating this game based exclusively on my personal enjoyment, I'd give it a 5 out of 5 in a heartbeat.  Since I do try to be fair and objective (usually), however, I can't rate this one any higher than a 2.
Exhuminator wrote:Ecchi lords must unite for great justice.

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Xeogred
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by Xeogred Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:19 pm

Dude I beat that sometime mid last year and still think about it. It left a mark... :lol:

This is some obtuse charm to be found in that heap.
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ElkinFencer10
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by ElkinFencer10 Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:20 pm

Xeogred wrote:Dude I beat that sometime mid last year and still think about it. It left a mark... :lol:

This is some obtuse charm to be found in that heap.

Like legit, Devil's Third is for me what Truxton is for Mark Bussler. I have this irrational and infinite love for it.
Exhuminator wrote:Ecchi lords must unite for great justice.

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REPO Man
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by REPO Man Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:20 pm

LEGO Harry Potter: Years 5-7 on PS4. Still gotta get the remaining trophies and collectibles.
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PartridgeSenpai
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by PartridgeSenpai Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:43 pm

ElkinFencer10 wrote:
Xeogred wrote:Dude I beat that sometime mid last year and still think about it. It left a mark... :lol:

This is some obtuse charm to be found in that heap.

Like legit, Devil's Third is for me what Truxton is for Mark Bussler. I have this irrational and infinite love for it.


I'm still meaning to pick that game up sometime, with all the talking up you've done about it. I love a stupid story if the gameplay is satisfying and meaty. It's still way too expensive though. I'll wait until it's like $20 or $10. If it never gets there? I'm okay with never playing it Xp

I had forgotten the guy behind Ninja Gaiden made it though. That REALLY explains a lot about why it's so terrible. So many of the more recent ones have such awful, awful problems (like the dumpster fire that's Yaiba Z) that this isn't outside of his wheelhouse, most certainly.
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Xeogred
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by Xeogred Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:49 pm

Devil's Third is very rare and went out of print basically instantly. Which makes it an even more hilarious collectors item, how I dropped like $50 on that thing. If you miraculously somehow see it in a store or pawn shop for under $50 you should grab it.

I think everything Itagaki does is pretty good. Dead or Alive was a little more serious under him back in the day, Ninja Gaiden Xbox and the sequel are awesome. He didn't do 3, but the Razor's Edge version is awesome. I thought it was amazing. He was long gone from Tecmo by the time Yaiba came out, which wasn't even developed by Team Ninja I believe. So yeah I couldn't link him or Team Ninja to that turd... I spent $7 on that and want that $7 back!

At least Nioh looks amazing and is Team Ninja making a comeback. Hope to get to that one soon.
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Re: Games Beaten 2017

by Sarge Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:56 pm

January:
1) The Secret of Monkey Island: Special Edition (PC) (8.5) (1/1) (~5.5 hours)
2) ActRaiser (SNES) (8.0) (1/2) (~4 hours)
3) Bonk's Revenge (GB) (6.0) (1/3) (~1 hour)
4) Tiny Toon Adventures: Babs' Big Break (GB) (6.5) (1/3) (~1 hour)
5) Blackwell Legacy (PC) (7.0) (1/5) (2.6 hours)
6) Blackwell Unbound (PC) (7.5) (1/7) (2.2 hours)
7) Blackwell Convergence (PC) (8.0) (1/7) (2.4 hours)
8) Blackwell Deception (PC) (8.0) (1/8) (4.7 hours)
9) Blackwell Epiphany (PC) (9.0) (1/9) (6.5 hours)
10) Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain (PS4) (8.0) (1/22) (~55 hours)
11) Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 (360) (8.0) (1/28) (~.5 hours)
12) Deep Duck Trouble Starring Donald Duck (SMS) (6.5) (1/31) (~1 hour)

February:
13) Quackshot Starring Donald Duck (GEN) (7.5) (2/7) (~2 hours)
14) Fire Emblem Heroes (Android) (8.0) (2/9) (~10 hours)
15) Super C (NES) (9.5) (2/20) (~0.5 hours)
16) Contra (NES) (10.0) (2/20) (~0.5 hours)
17) Mickey's Dangerous Chase (GB) (6.5) (2/24) (~1 hour)
18) My Nintendo Picross: The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (3DS) (8.5) (2/25) (~19 hours)
19) Mega Man 2 (NES) (10.0) (2/28) (~0.8 hours)

March:
20) Final Fantasy XV (PS4) (8.0) (3/2) (~33 hours)
21) Blaster Master Zero (NS) (9.0) (3/10) (~6.5 hours)
22) Espgaluda II Black Label (360) (8.0?) (3/17) (0.5 hours)
23) The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (NS) (9.5) (3/28) (~70+ hours)

April:
24) Shovel Knight: Specter of Torment (PC) (8.5) (4/7) (~5.5 hours)
25) Hyper Light Drifter (PS4) (8.0) (4/9) (~8 hours)
26) Gekido Advance: Kintaro's Revenge (GBA) (7.5) (4/16) (~3 hours)
27) Vanquish (PS3) (8.5) (4/17) (~7 hours)
28) Journey (PS3) (6.0) (4/19) (~2 hours)
29) GunForce (SNES) (4.0) (4/22) (~20 minutes)
30) GunForce 2 (ARC) (7.0) (4/23) (~30 minutes)
31) GunForce: Battle Fire Engulfed Terror Island (ARC) (6.0) (4/23) (~20 minutes)
32) Mighty Final Fight (NES) (8.5) (4/29) (~30 minutes)

May:
33) Final Fantasy V (SFC) (6.0) (5/1) (~33 hours)
34) Super Adventure Island (SNES) (7.0) (5/2) (~1 hour)
35) Dragon Spirit: The New Legend (NES) (7.5) (5/3?) (~30 minutes)
36) Mighty No. 9 (PS4) (5.0) (5/6?) (~5 hours)
37) Contra III: The Alien Wars (Hard) (SNES) (8.5) (5/11) (~1 hour)
38) Operation C (GB) (7.5) (5/22) (~1 hour)

June:
39) Super Dodge Ball (NES) (9.5) (6/1) (~15 minutes)
40) Bare Knuckle III (GEN) (7.5) (6/3) (~1 hour)
41) Super Mario Bros. 3 (NES) (9.5) (6/5) (~30 minutes)
42) Wizards & Warriors X: Fortress of Fear (GB) (4.0) (6/8) (~1 hour)
43) Castlevania: The Adventure (GB) (3.5) (6/9) (~1 hour)
44) Blossom Tales: The Sleeping King (PC) (8.0) (6/15) (~8.5 hours)
45) Streets of Rage (GEN) (9.0) (6/17) (~45 minutes)
46) Ghouls 'N Ghosts (GEN) (6.5) (6/17) (~4 hours)
47) Contra: Hard Corps (GEN) (8.5) (6/18) (~50 minutes)
48) Mighty Gunvolt Burst (NS) (7.5) (6/23) (~3 hours?)
49) Exile's End (PC) (8.0) (6/24) (~5 hours)

July:
50) Uncharted 4: A Thief's End (PS4) (8.5) (7/1) (16h53m)
51) Pharaoh Rebirth+ (PC) (8.0) (7/3) (7 hours)
52) Jackal (NES) (9.0) (7/9) (45 minutes)
53) Golden Axe III (NES) (2.5) (7/9) (~45 minutes)
54) Rygar (NES) (7.0) (7/10) (~2 hours)
55) Faxanadu (NES) (8.0) (7/14) (~6 hours)
56) Tekken 3 (PSX) (6.0) (7/24) (~20 minutes)
57) Horizon: Zero Dawn (PS4) (8.5) (7/30) (38h16m)

August:
58) Contra: The Alien Wars (GB) (3.5) (8/1) (~30 minutes)
59) Super Smash Bros. (N64) (8.0) (8/6) (~20 minutes)
60) Battletoads (Japan) (NES) (7.5) (8/10) (~40 minutes)
61) Castle of Dragon (NES) (2.5) (8/10) (~1 hour)
62) The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (NES) (3.0) (8/10) (~30 minutes)
63) Strider (NES) (6.5) (8/11) (~2 hours)
64) Commando (NES) (3.5) (8/11) (~1 hour)
65) Bio Miracle Bokutte Upa (NES) (6.5) (8/12) (~1h30m)
66) Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie (GEN) (4.0) (8/12) (~1 hour)
67) Dragon Scroll: Yomigaerishi Maryuu (NES) (5.0) (8/13) (~4 hours)
68) Mega Man 8 (SAT) (7.0) (8/17) (~4 hours)
69) Wonder Boy: The Dragon's Trap (PS4) (8.0) (8/19) (4h42m)
70) Super Puzzle Fighter II Turbo HD Remix (PS3) (6.5) (8/25) (~30 minutes)
71) Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth (DS) (7.5) (8/27) (25 hours?)
72) Daikatana (GBC) (6.5) (8/28) (~3 hours)
73) Bionic Commando (NES) (9.5) (8/30) (~1.5 hours)

Bionic Commando. Still an amazing game. Even the bad localization doesn't do much to mar the experience. Swinging around has quite the learning curve, but once you get it down, you're (mostly) golden. There are some tricky bits towards the end, but nothing too harrowing, and you'll encounter plenty of enemies on the world map to keep you rolling in continues. Capcom was on their A-game here, and the tight programming elevates it well above stuff like Strider. Strangely enough, it came out before that, so they clearly had some talented programmers on staff before Strider came out.
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