91. Wario World|GameCube|2003|platformer|4h 54m|5/10
Back in the GameCube days, Nintendo was comfortable farming their second tier franchises to trusted third parties for software development. So nobody could blame them for trusting Treasure to handle a Wario game. And thus, in 2003, Treasure gave us Wario World. A 3D platformer starring that loveable scoundrel Wario. The one thing I remember about its release thirteen years ago, was that in 2003 I was able to buy a new copy for less than $20. Wario Ware hit the bargain bins pretty fast.
Now I know why.
If you want health, you have to pay for it. And the price for health restoratives continuously increases. So does the price of continues.
On the outside Wario Ware looks decent enough. The graphics are passable (if bland), audio is sufficient (if uninspired), and the controls are tight (though at times ill conceived). At first glance, one could be forgiven for thinking Wario World to be the Wario equivalent of Mario Sunshine. But after spending an hour or two with the game, that lofty assumption quickly evaporates. Where Sunshine was continuously inventive, Wario World is tedious and incredibly formulaic. Where Sunshine was charming and intuitive, Wario World is monotonous and grating. Trading in imagination for sheer tedium, Wario World is a pale shadow of Mario's GameCube adventure.
These yellow balls make up 99% of the platforming gameplay.
Wario World only has eight levels. But those levels are extremely long, long enough to be three levels unto themselves. This is actually annoying when you've been playing a level for over thirty minutes, and you'd just like to save your game. You spend your time in these levels repetitively beating up the same old enemies (who get reskinned for each new level), and searching for enough crystals to open the exit gate at the end. The same core gameplay concepts in the first level, are repeated all the way to the end. If you like surprises in your platformers, forget it. Wario World's got one recipe and that's all it's cookin'.
Once in a while you get to do SOMETHING different, like run from elephants.
Wario World does have one saving grace; boss fights. We all know that Treasure is the world's best creator of epic boss fights. And even in a game as phoned in as Wario World, Treasure still kept up that aspect of their legacy. Boss fights in this game are truly fun, usually challenging, and always imaginative. The boss fights serve as a stark contrast to the bland nature of the rest of the game. At least here, Wario's beat 'em up moves actually make sense in a game like this. Honestly, I wish Wario World had just been a series of twenty or thirty boss fights. I would have had more fun with that actually.
Boss fights are fun. The rest of the game isn't.
I could type ten paragraphs explaining in minute detail all the bad game design in Wario World. I'll refrain, but I will complain about the one that bothered me the most. The attack button and dash button SHOULD NOT be the same button. Nothing like attacking on a platform, and then having Wario decide to dash instead and falling off, just because you held the attack button half a second instead of a quarter of a second. That kind of bone headed amateur hour design permeates this entire experience.
I'd say about $50,000 that Nintendo paid Treasure for this potboiler.
Less discerning gamers may find Wario World to be a fun time. Perhaps they could overlook the stuff that continuously bothered me. All I know is when I'm playing a Nintendo published platformer, I expect to have a smile on my face the whole time. With Wario World, I was usually just gritting my teeth and pushing myself to just have the damn thing over with. Yes there are great Wario platformers, I've beaten a few. Nintendo and Treasure have produced some amazing games together as well. But Wario World does not fit either description. Truly every time Wario exclaimed, "Have a rotten day!" I couldn't help but think he was actually talking to me.